“If your depressed, you’re living in the past. If you’re anxious, you’re living in the future. If you’re at peace, you’re living in the present.” ~ Dhru Purohit
I love this quote but it could be a little tough to swallow. Over my 20 year career of being in the health and fitness space, there’s one common theme that I believe is killing progress. That is…people are stuck in the past by either; comparing themselves to their former, younger self or, they keep listening to the story that’s been on repeat in their thoughts and mind which is MOSTLY untrue.
Here’s something for you, are you aware that 40% of your daily activities are habitual? AND your habits are just BS (Shock Horror Face Inserted Here)
THAT’S RIGHT BS! Bullshit? Perhaps.
Well, another way you could interpret your habitual lifestyle could be your “belief systems”(see, I didn’t actually say bullshit). But where did your BS derive from? More importantly, what LIE’s do you tell yourself from your belief system. (LIE’s – Limited Ideas Entertained – Jim Kwik)
These Limited Ideas Entertained are simply NOT true, but unfortunately, we give them huge power and too much space and time in our minds. But how do we stop the LIE’s in our head and start killing the ANT’s (Automatic Negative Thoughts)? We’ll get to a simple solution soon.
But I think it’s important to revisit your past just a tiny bit, so we can establish why we think and behave the way we do. Then, we can begin to reframe our mind and actually start to understand that our negative thoughts are in fact…lies.
So let’s revisit for a brief moment your childhood. Who were the key people in your life that extended their BS (positive or negative) onto you?
Parents are the obvious answer. However, it could also be, teachers, coaches, mentors, friends parents, carers, uncles, aunties, grandparents, churches, neighbours, media, etc. Could be anyone or anything you spent time with as a child.
Now try and identify one BS or LIE that was passed onto you. Here are just some examples;
You suck at school. Why can’t you read in front of the class? You’re terrible at Maths. Ideas around Religion. I have no co-ordination. You’re just big-boned. You’ll always be fat. It’s hereditary. You’re so skinny. You’re ugly. The earth is flat. Money is hard to come by. You must get a degree. Don’t do that, you’ll hurt yourself etc. This list can go on and on and on.
Your mind is ALWAYS eves dropping on your self-talk and your brain believes these stories you’ve been programming and storing all these years. But the good news is – Your brain is like a supercomputer and just like computer software can, it be updated. WE have the power to change these BS. So let’s start expanding your mind to what’s really possible instead of shrinking your beliefs to your preconceived and restricted potential.
“The voice in your head has a life of its own. Most people are at the mercy of that voice, they are possessed by thought by the mind since the mind is conditioned by the past, you’re then forced to reenact the past again, and again, and again.” ~ Eckart Tole
The first time I was exposed (or that I can remember) to what’s really possible was watching these kids just dominate the long and difficult monkey bars. These monkey bars were the old kind that went on for meters and meters which we’re also really high.
I was inspired by what I witness the other kids do, and I wanted in. I wanted to flow bar to bar just like them. So I jumped up and had a go myself. “I can do this,” I said to myself. Then I slipped or gave up (not quite sure) only about 3-4 bars in and plummeted to the dirt. My mind instantly reframed itself to “I can’t do this”, “I’m not strong enough”.
After only one attempt I now started to form a BS of “I’ll never be able to do this”.
However, I woke up the next day (maybe via a dream) and thought “But it’s not impossible”. If those monkey bars were impossible the other kids wouldn’t have made it across either. So it IS possible. As a result, I decided to try again. Each attempt I was getting further and further. I soon figured out how to swing more efficiently. I assessed moving slower across the bars was harder. I enabled a swing-like movement transferring to every second bar was not only efficient but conserving energy in the process.
During this process, my belief system became stronger and stronger. And the more I believed, the better I got. I wasn’t physically any stronger overnight…I was fueled by belief.
A more common story that this is clearly evident, is the Roger Bannister story. If you’re unsure of who Rodger Bannister is, you can read a great description HERE. But in short, Roger Bannister was the first person to ever run sub 4min in a mile run. This feat was deemed unbreakable for many many years prior. In fact, it was believed (by “experts” that the heart would explode if it ever went under 4min for the mile.
However, on May 6th 1954 Roger ran the mile in 3 min 59.4sec proving that the barrier was indeed breakable. The interesting part of this story is that only 2months after Rodger did the seemingly impossible, his record was broken. Then that record was broken again not long after. What Rodger Banister did, was give other competitors hope, belief, and reassurance that the mile can be run in under 4mins.
It’s not always easy to reframe your thinking after losses, failures & misfortunes. For some reason “The brain is like Velcro for bad experiences, yet Teflon for positive experiences” ~ Dr Rick Hanson. In other words, the negative experiences stick to our brain like glue and the positives ones just slip away without a trace. And this is why gratitude journaling has proven to have a profound positive experience on our brains. By recording the wins, positives, and things you’re grateful for, this helps the positive experiences stick and not slip away. During this process, we are beginning to reframe our brain, change the programming, and start to believe what is possible. This is what’s known as Neuroplasticity.
Neuroplasticity is also referred to as “brain plasticity”. Basically, every time you learn something new or developed another behavior, your brain makes new synaptic connections. Every time this happens, you are physically changing and upgrading your brain.
Lastly, another very simple technique that you could use to start reframing your negative BS is to add the word… “yet” on the end of each negative self-talk sentence. For example
“I just can’t run….YET”
“I’m no good at learning this technology…YET”
“I’m not going to be fit…YET”
“I can’t say no to cake…YET”
By adding this simple and effective word to the end of each sentence it opens up the possibilities and allows hope. This could be a game changer.
One last thought I want to leave you with…” The sky is not the limit, your mind is”
Author Jason Clark – Co-Founder Perform 360